One thing I’ve learned as my children have gone off to college: with each one that leaves home, I get a piece of my brain back. It’s true. Suddenly all the day-to-day details that I keep in my head are gone, for I don’t see them on a day-to-day basis. Nor do I know all the assignments or appointments or responsibilities that fill their schedules. Therefore, I don’t have to wonder, remind, cajole, or take care of any of those things. And that’s where a portion of my brain is free again. Free from multi-tasking on the cognitive level. Free of details that are no longer mine to remember. Free of anxiety, for if I don’t know, I don’t worry.
What I find really amazing about this is that this is true in spite of having three very independent children. I haven’t taken care nor kept up with everything for them, by any means. And yet even then there are just things a mom carried around in her head when her children live at home. (For instance, my head gets more cluttered in the summers when my son comes home and I have two kids and a husband to fill my brain with things like work schedules and trying to figure out who will be home for dinner on what days!) To be honest, these last few weeks of every senior year are the worst–filled with dates to remember, details to get done before graduation, and lists of things to get done before sending them to college in August starting to pile up. Add on a major bathroom redo and revisions on a deadline and, well, I’m ready to have my brain back. All of it. I just keep telling myself that August is coming . . .
I hear ya. At first my theory was labor kills brain cells, for I was much smarter before I had children than afterwards. But now that they are all adults (and out of the house) I can see that it wasn’t labor… it was keeping everyone’s life straight besides my own. That big revelation came when the last one left for college and all I had to worry about in the mornings was getting myself and lunch ready before heading out the door to work. I guess our brains are finite… and there is only so much space to keep information organized. Hang in there… easier days are coming. At least when it comes to brain space!!
Thanks, Julie! So glad to know I’m not alone–and that my theory holds true!
You can make it, you can make it! Of course, I say that as someone who does not have kids…haha. But…my parents are about to become empty-nesters this spring and I’m pretty sure they’re seeing that same light at the end of the tunnel. Praying all of you get your brains back. 🙂
Ok, wow. I feel really old, Melissa, knowing that your parents are in the same boat I am! 🙂
It is kind of amazing to think that after all these years, hubby and I will have only ourselves to keep up with on a daily basis.
A consummation most devoutly to be wished! Alas, still three years off for me. I’ve been an active mom for 34 years now. I’m not sure how much brain I’ll have left!
Oh my goodness, Katherine! You make my 22 years look like nothing! I had mine all quick and close, which has been the complete chaos that is coming to an end. I’m sure you’ll have more brain power left than you imagine when it gets freed up for you to use on something other than children!